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My new phone is a pain and keeps reminding me of life before Covid

I

got a new phone the other week. To be honest I got it last month, but it took two weeks for me to pluck up enough courage to open the box. I have an absolute fear of any new technology, which is why I never update my desktop computer until I have no other choice, at which point l leave the room because the sight of a black screen reminds me too much of flatlining patients in hospital dramas and I find myself saying tiny prayers in the toilet until the reboot is complete.

Obviously, considering that I was the surgeon in charge of this delicate operation, things didn’t go according to plan and I had to resort to “manual mode”, which involved quite a lot of hitting myself on the head and crying to get the thing working.